This is what had my full attention last week

The moment I hit play on Tarana Burke and Brene Brown's new book, You Are Your Best Thing, was profound. 

They took me by heart from the very start. The introduction stopped me in my tracks and rendered nun and void any thoughts of listening whilst undertaking the mundane but necessary household tasks I had planned to do. 

They had my full attention. 

It's an anthology about vulnerability, shame resilience and the black experience. The Introduction is a conversation between Tarana and Brene and it spoke life into so many of my feelings about so much. 

I'm a big Brene Brown fan, she is right up there as one of my top wholehearted inspo's and there's also been a sticking point. 

A sticking point that I know well, so much so that when Tarana called it and shared the very words I had been thinking with Brene, it felt like a heart reckoning and homecoming.  

You see, as much as I love Brene's work and see myself in it, there is always a level of having to ‘contort myself to fit’. A familiar muscle memory of contortion that has had many an opportunity to be honed and practised. 

From the days of reading books as a child, watching films as a teenager and finding make-up as a young adult and many more occurrences in between and beyond. 

Always contorting myself to fit a narrative that did not see me, let alone consider my needs. Therefore unconsciously wielding its power to displace, erase and ignore in one fail swoop whilst simultaneously attempting to diminish the light of possibility. 

It continued when I entered the wellness/personal development/entrepreneurial space. Which undoubtedly has been a catalyst for my mission of creating an industry for the many and not the few. And one that doesn't start or end with representation. 

That's the tick box, easy way out.  

What I'm talking about is what Tarana and Brene have done in this book by speaking to the nuance, refusing to bypass lived experience and instead generating room and giving space to deeper and more whole stories.  

Whilst we might savour our similarities and commune within our commonalties of experiences, the paths to those places are different and ‘we must pay attention to that road. That road is our humanity, that road is the piece we are talking about’, which is the truth-bomb that Tarana ended the Introduction on.  

The visceral reaction I had to being seen and heard by 2 women whose work I hugely admire on such a public stage was palatable. 

I sobbed as I listened to Austin Channing Brown share what Brene's well-known concept of ‘foreboding joy’ looks and feels like from her model of the world as a black woman. Hearing her talk of being in the throes of early labour and discussing with her husband their game plan if the medical staff weren't treating them as they should, took me right back to the very same conversation I was having prior and during my labour with my youngest daughter.  

This is what happens when you speak to the nuance.  

When you share your story and therefore allow others to hear their story in yours.

When you create what you wish existed.

Creating what I wish existed and being what I want to see are two messages that have come through both loud and clear and as persistent whispers in my ear with gusto this year. 

Whilst it might not have been this way for you, there are many things that unite being a big-hearted creative and having a vision of creating what you wish existed is one of them.

So today, I'm sharing and bringing it forth for you to land how it will.  

If you follow the path of creating what you wish existed and being what you wish to see, you'll be leaning on your own unique perspective and your own unique being.

If we need a working definition of authentic and wholehearted creating what could be more than that.

If you create what you wish existed, you'll be speaking to what others have been consciously and unconsciously desiring, things they might not have even realised is possible until it is put in front of them.

And that's exactly what I found as a willing and grateful recipient and consumer of You Are Your Best Thing. 

This week, I’ll be opening enrolment for the Root + Rise Membership Collective which is a way I can support you to create what you wish existed. 

Wishing you a beautiful Bank Holiday Monday. 

Sending love,

P.S - I've had a name change over on Instagram and I'm now playing at @nicolaraewickham do come and say hello when you are meandering through the squares. 

P.P.S - If there is anyone who you think would benefit from reading this email, feel free to share the love and forward it them.