Advice For Men- From A Woman With Plenty Of Experience!
Advice For Men- From A Woman With Plenty Of Experience!

Part Six: The 8th quality of a powerful, respected man

Email sent: Feb 13, 2020 10:56 am

Is this your brand on Milled? You can claim it.

Personally I am very fond of strawberries and cream, but I have found that for some strange reason, fish prefer worms. So when I went fishing, I didn’t think about what I wanted. I thought about what they wanted. I didn't bait the hook with strawberries and cream. Rather, I dangled a worm or grasshopper in front of the fish and said: "Wouldn't you like to have that?" Why not use the same common sense when fishing for people?

- Dale Carnegie

Hello members,

Over the past several days I've been releasing a series of articles based around ten of the leading qualities it takes to get what you want & be a leader, while NOT being (or becoming) some overbearing, egotistical, blowhard. It's now time to discuss the 8th quality.

Okay, now let's discuss the 8th quality of a powerful, respected man....

Opening: I'm delving into the subject of demonstrating power & leadership again, in relation to being a WholeMan character. These are also aspects women are reporting they're lacking seeing from men- and a surprisingly high amount of women are reporting that they're wishing for in a number of surveys & recent studies. Plus, as we've discussed in recent months, an increasing percentage of younger women are beginning to gravitate towards older men, because they have these such qualities.

I believe the majority of men (especially younger men) are unsure of how to demonstrate power and to assert their needs & desires, because many men are now taught (or conditioned) to be these sexually-passive, meek, nice gentlemen and there is this prevailing social message that anyone who is outspoken, sets high expectations, commands attention and respect, and so forth, is either on a power trip, has an "ego", is possibly even narcissistic, or when it comes to the dating/sexual front, is misogynistic.

And while narcissism does exist (I've spoken plenty about it), and misogyny does exist (spoken about that plenty, too), and some people do have power trips and are filled with ego.... There is great confusion for many men as to where to draw that line. What is enough, but not too much. In addition, unfortunately, some men seem to have the completely wrong definition of what being a leader and being powerful is, and associate it with being overly assertive, crushing the spirits of others, and being overly demanding- when those are the exact opposite traits of a good, successful & respected leader.

Striking the correct balance as a refined WholeMan is an important topic. Therefore, my hope is that the qualities I'm presenting in this series of articles will greatly assist many of you in defining the difference and even further developing your personality and the respect that others (especially women) have for you....

How to be respected, have your needs met (sexual and other needs), have the type of household and the lover/spouse you desire, lead the WholeMan Lifestyle, command attention, set rules and expectations, better engineer your social circle and be admired within that circle, pursue your hobbies, be in control of your money and time, and so forth, without being (or becoming) some overbearing, egotistical, blowhard....

I've outlined ten of the leading qualities it takes to get what you want & be a leader, while NOT being (or becoming) some overbearing, egotistical, blowhard.

Here's the 8th....

8. Delegate & focus on your strengths
This one is especially hard for anyone who is a naturally born "take charge" person, as I am, and enjoys having control of all aspects. I'll admit, this is one I've struggled with both in business & relationships. It's my constant temptation to micro-manage....
And I see many men struggling with this as well, and they attempt to complete tasks which simply aren't their strength, or their time could be much better spent on something else. This doesn't just include your work, it includes all things house related, even your clothing, and so forth.
For instance, if a man just isn't good with style or colors, or just simply hates going shopping, then there is no reason for him to step inside a mall, or waste time & money on clothing that doesn't look good on him. This is something he can delegate. Possibly he can make a deal with his sister who shops regularly for her husband anyhow, or a female friend, or (if money allows) hire a professional. The same goes with house cleaning, car detailing, laundry, as well as all things work related....

It even includes screening women & finding women to date. This is why some men call upon services such as "It's Just Lunch", which I don't think is a bad choice, if approached wisely. It can also include asking friends and family members to help you in finding someone. Or, having a female friend or family member write your online profile, and help you take proper photographs.

Many men, especially single men, put a good deal of pressure on themselves to do everything, especially prior to a date. They struggle over what to wear, where to shop, how to clean their house, getting the car prepared, so on and so forth (usually waiting to the very last day to do all of this), then they show up for the date exhausted & frazzled. Not good.
One of the important aspects of being the WholeMan is learning to barter for the things you aren't good at, or just being willing to pay for them, and managing your time wisely, recognizing your strengths and weaknesses.
I also witness a good number of men who focus on other "stuff", just to avoid going out and actually meeting women & chance enjoying life. While you need to be responsible, meet deadlines, take care of your body & health, and you can't just hand everything off to someone else, at the same time, you never want to use various errands, work, household needs, or your own personal goals (example: "Once I lose 10 more pounds, I'll start going out and talking to women") as an excuse to avoid going out, pursuing interests, meeting women, and enjoying your life.

A good leader knows when to delegate, and uses his time wisely. Especially when it comes to women or his relationships/marriage. His focus is on being his best, looking his best, and being the most productive possible. And if that means handing certain tasks or needs off to someone else, then so be it.

Never be afraid to ask for help from trusted, reliable people. They're likely to be your best ally in finding a good woman, enjoying your life more, or just allowing you more sleep so you can be your most attractive self.

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