"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide

Our New Trick for At-Home Married Date Nights

Email sent: Feb 12, 2020 12:06pm

Is this your brand on Milled? You can claim it.

It's your daily post from To Love, Honor and Vacuum!
View this email in your browser

To Love, Honor and Vacuum

Latest posts from on 02/12/2020


Our New Trick for At-Home Married Date Nights

By Sheila Wray Gregoire on Feb 12, 2020 07:06 am

I have something super quick and fun for you today–the new way that Keith and I are doing date nights at home!

Now, “married date nights” may be a misnomer, because I’m not talking about spending the whole evening in one activity.

But what I mean is this: We often get into ruts where we watch a lot of Netflix and I knit. I need that time to knit; it’s relaxing, and I love it. But as I was sharing last month when we talked about habits, when something becomes your default, it’s hard to break it.

That’s why we often spend a lot longer than we would want to on certain activities, and ignore the activities that we actually do want to do! Because we only have so much brain power to use in a day, we naturally gravitate towards the things that are the easiest and that have become habitual. If we want to do something different, then we have to deliberately start a new pattern.

So here’s what we do.

Every night, before we’re allowed to watch Netflix, we roll dice to tell us what we’re going to do for twenty minutes first.

Let me explain.

We have a number of hobbies that we do together (you can find your own to try in the 79 Hobbies for Couples!), and we absolutely love several new two-player board games that we’ve bought recently, and that I talked about yesterday. The problem is that we don’t do them nearly as often as we would like.

So at the beginning of the year we decided something had to change–especially since we were going on a 3-week cruise in February with my mother, and we wanted to be ready to have fun dancing on the cruise! (because one of our big hobbies is ballroom dancing!).

Keith and I dancing at a garden party back in 2001!

I shared a while ago how we take ballroom dancing lessons online with Passion4Dancing, and I wanted to nail the chacha and the swing down before we left for the cruise (we’re pretty good at the rumba and foxtrot), but that meant that we had work to do. We can do that work pretty easily in 20 minute sessions, though. Each lesson is only about 8 minutes long, and then we can practice what you’ve learned for several minutes to music on YouTube.

Passion4Dancing has 3 free lessons in each dance type, so you can learn the basic steps to the Rumba, Chacha, Swing, Waltz, Foxtrot, and more. Then you can buy a membership and get even better (that’s what we’ve done)! Here’s a video I made of us doing the rumba a few years ago:

Watch the Video


Check out Passion4Dancing here!

So we decided that we’d make sure that we spent 20 minutes doing something together, where we’re actually enjoying each other and spending time together, before we get on a screen.

We assigned it like this (the last three options are board games that I featured in last week’s post on two-player board games!).

  1. Genealogy (we’re tracing our family trees on Ancestry.com!)
  2. Ballroom Dancing
  3. Take a walk
  4. Play Photosynthesis
  5. Play Tiny Towns
  6. Play Wingspan

Realizing how much help we needed with ballroom dancing, we amended it so that we did dancing EVERY night in January (prepping for our cruise), and then rolled the dice for something else to do, but it works great!

Now, Photosynthesis and Wingspan do take more than 20 minutes, but that’s okay. We still like doing them.

So why not try something like that for your date nights at home?


Make a list of 6 things you’d like to do more often, and then roll the dice. As soon as the kids go to bed, do that thing together. Then you can watch Netflix or do something on your own afterwards, too. But at least you’ve spent some time together.

When we get back from our cruise we’re going to add some organizing tasks to the dice–assign different closets/rooms to the numbers, and roll the dice and we have to spend 10 minutes organizing before we move on to something fun. But you get the picture. Can be adapted for whatever you want–even something sexual (I’ve got dice in my sexy dares!)

What (other than sex!) do you wish you and your spouse would do more of together? What’s keeping you? Let’s talk in the comments!

Sheila Wray Gregoire has been married for 27 years and happily married for 22! She loves traveling around North America with her hubby in their RV, giving her signature "Girl Talk" about sex and marriage. And she's written 8 books. About sex and marriage. See a theme here? Plus she knits. Even in line at the grocery store.
Are you ready to take your marriage to the next level?
Sign up for our emails and get access to the TLHV free marriage and parenting resource library. We have over 25 downloads and are constantly adding more. Sign up here!

Read in browser »


Recent Articles:

10 Resources to Help You Get More Comfortable with Your Body
Love Your Body Series: Do You KNOW Your Body?
Let’s learn to have FUN again! | Reader Highlights from the Week
PODCAST EXTRAS: How Do You Feel Comfortable with Your Body?
5 Physical Reasons Your Libido is Sub-Zero: How to Bring a Low Libido out of Hibernation
Add your thoughts! Come on over to the blog to join in the comments--and leave your own. 
Click HERE to chime in!
Comments submitted to tolovehonorandvacuum.com are subject to review and I reserve the right to edit or remove any comments at my discretion for containing insulting, offensive, or unlawful content, or for otherwise violating the goals of a positive, constructive environment.

The comment section of tolovehonorandvacuum.com is a public forum, so commenters are primarily responsible for their own anonymity and any personal details shared in the comments. The contents of a comment may be featured in future posts for the purpose of highlighting an issue I am discussing.

Copyright © 2020 To Love, Honor and Vacuum, All rights reserved.
You are receiving this email because you opted in at To Love, Honor and Vacuum; purchased one of Sheila Wray Gregoire's products, or downloaded one of her free items; or signed up for the newsletter at one of her speaking engagements.

Our mailing address is:
To Love, Honor and Vacuum
Box 20201
Belleville, ON K8N 5V1

Add us to your address book

unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences 

Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

Other emails from "any Novel" Novel Study Guide

"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 27, 2020
Why "Bouncing Your Eyes" seriously bugs me...
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 27, 2020
So….Can I Write a “COVID-19 Sucks” Post?
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 26, 2020
PODCAST: Do All Guys Lust? Let’s Rethink Every Man’s Battle
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 25, 2020
Is “Bouncing Your Eyes” So You Don’t Lust Respectful to Women?
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 24, 2020
Can We Respect Women, Please? A New Look at the Church’s View on Lust
"any Novel" Novel Study Guide
Mar 23, 2020
How Are You All Doing?