EVERYTHING 50% OFF

Tomorrow. ONE MINUTE ONLY. Set your damn alarms.

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Tomorrow. ONE MINUTE ONLY. Set your damn alarms.
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50% off Monday Nov 15th

The Cyber Monday Minute is back, and we're bringing it to you early this year. 

something about supply chains. logistics. inflation. maritime law. idk.

Here's how it works:

Everything on the website will be 50% off for 60 seconds tomorrow. Monday. November 15th. 

this isn't a joke
ADD TO CALENDAR

I'll even let you in on a secret:

The key is to have your cart ready to go by 2:00pm Mountain Standard Time.

Have your items in the cart.

Have your shipping info filled out.

Have your payment method ready.

At 2:00pm MST, refresh the page and the discount will be automatically applied.

If think you can manage clicking the "Pay Now" button by 2:01pm, you'll get the whole damn thing for 50% off.

that is the highest amount we discount our products
it does not get cheaper than this
ADD TO CALENDAR

I just laid out the whole thing for you right there. This is IMPOSSIBLE to f*ck up.

If you somehow still manage to, you deserve the suffering and pain that comes with knowing you just missed the biggest sale of the year.

FIGURE OUT WHAT TIME 2:00PM MST IS FOR YOU AND SET YOUR ALARM

2:00pm Mountain Standard Time is:

4:00pm East Coast Time
3:00pm Central Time
1:00pm Pacific Time
Late Monday Night for Europe & Africa
Early Tuesday Morning for Asia & Oceana

FIGURE IT OUT

I EVEN FOUND THIS TIME CONVERTER FOR YOU WITH THE TIME ALREADY PLUGGED IN FOR GOD'S SAKE IT'S SO F*CKING EASY

OR YOU CAN JUST ADD TO CALENDAR
DON'T F*CK THIS UP
SEE YOU TOMORROW
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Here's the Unsubscribe button in case you can't handle the pressure or are offended by the word f*ck with an asterisk in it. Just pretend we're saying fack and buy your kid the Pit Vipers they want so you can be done with Christmas shopping and get back to that Hallmark movie marathon.
Pit Viper 159 W Haven Ave Salt Lake City, UT 84115

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