Believe it or not, the final weekend of Love Island USA is already upon us, meaning we’re only days away from finding out who will live happily ever after… until they quietly part ways once the influencer checks start hitting in 6-8 weeks. This season, Aftersun has gotten a major makeover, with Summer House star Ciara Miller and social media breakout Tefi Pessoa stepping in to host the Saturday episodes. We braved the time difference with Fiji (don’t ask us what it is) to chat with Ciara and Tefi about some of this season’s most shocking moments, and what might be next for this summer’s islanders.

(This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.)

BETCHES: How’s Fiji treating you?

TEFI PESSOA: It’s tough. I landed and said, “What is this, Detroit?” No, I’m kidding.

CIARA MILLER: It’s sunny, it’s beautiful, we have great tans. It took Tefi a while to catch up to me, but she’s there.

BETCHES: Well, it’s another year of Love Island causing all the conversation. What has been the most shocking moment of the season for you so far?

CIARA: Movie night. I’m like, gagged at movie night. Imagine having — actually, I’ve lived it. It doesn’t matter how many times you go through it, the secondhand anxiety never goes away for other people. How do I do this? How are they doing this?

TEFI: Any time there’s a recoupling, or it’s movie night, or any kind of accountability, it’s kind of how I feel watching the Olympics or a championship where I want both teams to win.

CIARA: Are you a participation trophy type of person?

TEFI: That’s the only way I have trophies. But watching these kids go through the trials and tribulations of friendship and romantic life in such a pressure cooker — I love my little Sims, and I want them to be okay. But also, wreak havoc.

BETCHES: Being involved in the season, what has changed in your perspective about the show?

TEFI: The producers give a very kind edit. They really do protect their Islanders… except for the psychological warfare.

CIARA: It’s such a strong parasocial relationship the audience has because of the voting aspect. Being on reality TV, I can give an opinion, but I’m never trying to give it with such a bold chest, because things change. From one night to the other in the villa, it’s really hard to be set in an opinion about someone. And they’re being filmed for so long, and you only see an hour.

TEFI: Everyone in the world has been 23, and gone through a friendship breakup, or betrayal, or some kind of dumping. When I see people so passionate, it’s because somebody in there reminds them of themselves, and how they wanted someone to stick up for them.

CIARA: Love Island will be studied in psych classes, I promise you.

BETCHES: Let’s do a rapid fire. We love seeing our reality TV favorites on other competition shows, so tell me who from this season of Love Island would excel at these—

CIARA: Sincere, Traitors.

BETCHES: Noted.

CIARA: And for a girl, Kenzie.

TEFI: I don’t think she’d know if she was a traitor.

BETCHES: She’d get over those banishments real quick. What about Survivor?

CIARA: Kenzie would do fine on Survivor. And for a guy, Caleb.

BETCHES: Ciara, who would you pick to join you on Dancing With the Stars?

CIARA: Trinity. Or Aniya.

BETCHES: Which pair would compete on Amazing Race?

CIARA: Carl and Aniya.

TEFI: He’s patient, and gentle. And Aniya’s fine as shit.

CIARA: If I were on Amazing Race, I’d be screaming at my partner. I could never do it.

BETCHES: We’ve seen a lot of guys make a lot of breakfasts this season. Who would be on Worst Cooks In America?

CIARA: Maybe Corbin, because he does shapes with his pancakes, and I’m concerned with how close he has to get to make the shapes.

TEFI: *Mimicking Corbin* This is a smoothie.

BETCHES: We have a lot of models in the house; who would be on America’s Next Top Model?

TEFI: Kayda. That bitch is stunning. I got nervous when she talked to me.

CIARA: Bryce! Bryce is the model.

TEFI: You wanna be on top? No Trinity, you wanna be on top?

BETCHES: Lastly, who would be on Jeopardy?

CIARA: Sincere. We don’t know if it’s accurate or not, but he’s got an answer for everything.

TEFI: Oh wait, put Corbin on Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?