Why pain can feel safer than happiness

Hi there,

Many of us assume that if we are in pain, it’s because something painful is happening to us. That pain is something coming in from the outside.

Something Teal has observed is that some people carry an internal wall. Not one that blocks pain from getting in. A wall that keeps love, happiness, and support out. And that keeps pain IN.

At first, this may sound strange. Why would anyone hold onto pain? But when you look deeper, it begins to make sense. For some people, love has not felt safe. Happiness has not felt reliable. Support has not felt stable. Good things have felt like something that could disappear, be taken away, or be used against them.

And when that happens enough times, something inside a person adapts.

This is one of the reasons pain can be so hard to let go of. It is not always just about making pain stop. Sometimes, it is about understanding why some part of you may have learned to hold onto it.

And maybe the pain you are carrying is not proof that something is wrong with you. Maybe it is part of a strategy that once helped you survive.

But a strategy that once protected you can eventually become the very thing that keeps you stuck.

This is one of the reasons Teal is hosting a free live online Q&A next weekend. During this event, you’ll have the opportunity to submit your questions about pain for the chance to have Teal answer them directly.

What would it mean for you to finally let the good things in, and let the pain out?

Over the next few days we will continue to share more about pain, what it really is, and how to begin working with it instead of against it.